Is 'Facebook' pornography in disguise?

I regularly work in a famous library in my university. As a break from work, I walk in a circle around its centre where all the computers are. I noticed this week, much to my surprise, that almost every terminal seemed to be on 'Facebook' and as I looked further afield I noticed many of the laptops were also on it. For those who are unaware of this phenomena, Facebook is a virtual community (a little like Myspace) that links groups of people as 'friends' and this then initiates or builds relationship.

Or does it?

Samuel Johnson wrote " True happiness consists not in the multitude of friends, but in their worth and choice". At this juncture, I have to confess I am not on Facebook and am only too aware that there is a certain amount of irony about commenting on a blog about my reservations about virtual community. However, I have been increasingly encouraged to join facebook by people who say to me "I'll be your friend" but something about it doesn't seem quite right. Does being a friend constitute a few photo's and an email exchange or two or does this not do the word 'friend' a great disservice?

Here's an example. A friend who is on facebook noted that someone had requested to be his 'facebook friend' but was confused that this same person had made no effort to build any form of normal relationship with him in the 18 months that this has been a possibility. There have been plenty of chances to meet for a cup of coffee, chat and get to know one another, were it not for the fact that this person has consistently ignored him. So why send him a 'facebook friend' request? Well, perhaps it is just a bit of fun and you simply get to add another name and photo onto your growing list of virtual companions. This makes you look popular, functional, in touch, wanted, fun and good to be with. Or is there something more subtle at work that is not the healthy fun that it might at first seem?

Here is my leap of thought that may be a tad controversial but here goes. Is facebook not actually pornography in disguise? Is it not detached and non-committed relationship meeting a temporary need in the vacuum of the human heart without the cost and investment of what it truly means to meet someone face to face and be their friend. That's what porn is isn't it? An escape into a pretend and fantasy encounter being lived out in a false environment by other people but bearing no reality to what it actually means to be in an intimate and wholehearted relationship with someone. Is it madness to compare a voyeuristic internet sex addiction with having a bit of fun on facebook? Maybe so and I acknowledge this is an extreme, but it's a thought.

'A mirror reflects a man's face, but what he is really like is shown by the friends he chooses' advises the Proverb(27:19). I don't have many friends and I am not sure I am a very good one but those I do have are those I have walked a long race with face to face. I have seen their joy, their pain, their triumphs and disasters and we have been refined through many adventures together. I have seen them cry, heard them confess, watched them grow and change and learn. I have prayed with them and for them, argued with them and heard truth from them and they amazingly have been prepared to bear with me through the years. Someone tell me how you do friendship like that on the internet? The truth is I'm not sure you do.

'Those friends thou hast, and their adoption tried. Grapple them to thy soul with hoops of steel; But do not dull thy palm with entertainment of each new-hatched unfledged comrade" said William Shakespeare and I think may have had a point.